Extreme versus Balanced

This is the second beginning to this blog post, as well as the second title.  Why?  Because I am trying to sum up my personality, and what my personality type has to do with my inability to stick to goals I have set for myself time and time again to become a healthier person.  At first I thought I was a food addict, but that was basically an excuse I used for my constant failure at diets.  According to the Merriam-Webster online dictionary addict means  "to devote or surrender (oneself) to something habitually or obsessively."  In some sense that could possibly describe me, but I have proven in the past that I can go without food.  When I was going to WW, I would stop eating on Sunday night, and go completely without food until my weigh-in on Tuesday evening.  I can go without food.  If addict did not fit, what about undisciplined?  I can certainly be that.  Ask my co-workers about the paperwork that is still sitting on my desk and should have been turned in weeks ago.  Ask my husband about the many promises not to spend money we don't have simply because I believe I need something.  Ask God about my shoddy prayer life and Bible study.  Don't do that last one please.  Seriously.  I have started and stopped so many weight loss programs, and Bible studies, and exercise regimens, that I am embarrassed to begin to give them a number.  But does the word undisciplined describe me best?  After all, I have worked since I was 16 years old, and have been at my current job for a month shy of 20 years.

I believe that while I have an addictive personality, and am pretty much undisciplined, as well as impulsive, selfish, lazy, etc., the word that best describes who I am is EXTREME.  While there are many variations of the definition of that word, the one that seems most to describe me is "going to great or exaggerated lengths."

Take dieting for instance.  In a previous blog post, I stated that my eating plan of choice would be low carb.  I have been on low carb diets before and have been incredibly successful.  In all honesty, a low carb diet is perfect for me for many reasons.  I believe, although I have never been tested, that I have a low tolerance for all things gluten and sugary.  I feel better physically when I do not eat bread or sugar.  My hunger diminishes drastically when I cut out most carbs.  It is a doable diet for me, especially with the introduction of nut flours and good for you sugar substitutes.  It is doable, IF I never eat out with friends, have unlimited money to spend for those expensive nut flours and sugar substitutes, and never plan to eat banana pudding again for the rest of my life.  It is doable, but it is EXTREME.  

Take exercise.  I am either all in or all out.  I either exercise every day for at least an hour, or I give it up completely and channel surf from my sofa.  Yesterday for example, I told my husband that I planned to walk to choir practice that evening.  It is 3.52 miles to FBC Jacksonville from my house if I go the back roads.  Since Jacksonville is only pedestrian friendly when you get into the heart of town, it would have been necessary to use the trail, adding some mileage on.  It was an insane idea for someone who professes to only walking when necessary, and knowing that it would be dark when I got out of practice, I would have to go through town on the way home, and call someone to pick me up when I ran out of sidewalk.  Could I have done it?  Sure.  Was it a bit fool hardy?  If the look on Anthony's face was any indication, I would say, yes it was.  

Cycling has fallen prey to my extreme personality on more than one occasion.  There have been the times when I set out to just ride a few miles, and decided to push my limits and ride all the way to Piedmont and back, which is 30 miles give or take a few miles.  This is doable and pleasurable even when I have been riding for a while and have built up my endurance.  The EXTREME me decides to do this after only being back on my bike for a WEEK, and on my cruiser that only has two good speeds.  When I ride with friends, I most often ride with those who are much more physically fit than I am----MUCH MORE, and I refuse to admit when I am exhausted, and am usually the bozo who says "let's ride one way for an hour, and then turn around and ride an hour back.  Let's also do this when the winds are high."  How about "let's keep going.  I am sure darkness will not set in until we get back."  Probably the most extreme idea I had was to ride the Ladiga Trail in its entirety in one day round trip on my cruiser.  That did not happen, or I might not have lived to tell about it.

An extreme personality needs balance, and I find my balance in the people closest to me.  My husband who looks at me as if I have two heads when I have one of my crazy ideas.  The friend who says "hey, I need to slow down" giving me permission to admit that I need to do the same.  The eating plan that comes along and says "you don't need to be an extreme dieter.  You just need balance."  Balance is what will keep me on my path to wellness.  Whether it is in my eating, or with my exercise, BALANCE is the key to my success.  

Balance may mean that it takes a little longer to reach my goals, but it may also mean that I will become a bit less addictive, a bit more disciplined, and a whole lot happier.

Here are a couple of pictures from one of my rides last week.  We traveled a bit further down the north portion of the trail, and added another friend.